The Food Network - Don't believe the hype...
Another stain on the Cutting Board...
Cooking is nothing like what you see on TV.
Seriously, nothing. Most people that see cooking on TV think how fun it would be to become a Chef, but they have no idea the amount of physical effort, insane scheduling, stress and lack of loyalty are involved. Also, there's really no money to speak of unless you're extremely lucky and in the right place at the right time. Do you realize that they average Chef works on salary for maybe $35,000 a year... and culinary school costs close to $48,000? Not just that, but most salaried Chefs work more than 60 hours per week and never have weekends or holidays off. That's Chefs folks - not cooks. Cooks can expect to make about $11.00 and hour and again, no weekends or holidays. Anyone who's ever worked a busy shift can tell you that it's not always fun. Orders start flying in faster than you can think, your coworkers can get irritable (and sometimes dangerous), oil-burns, cuts, steam-burns and bitchy customers are all a possibility and the list goes on...
On TV, you see sparkly-eyed spotless Chefs happily making one dish in an entire hour but in reality, a working Chef is on the verge of an adrenaline-fueled heart attack, is covered in kitchen spatter, reeks of garlic, is working on 10 dishes every minute and most likely holds a certain unspoken contempt for his customers. All this to try and pay off that student loan and still have enough left over for booze.
I'm not putting down every Chef you see on TV but lately The Food Network has been responsible for giving some complete hacks their own "cooking" shows. I stopped championing The Food Network after the introduction of Rachel Ray. Rachel Ray a Chef?! The guy frying your frozen calamari at Red Lobster has more credentials than her! Here's a woman who won a Food Network contest that dealt more with how the contestants looked on camera than their actual cooking ability. Now, she's teaching America that French's Fried Onions and canned corn are quality ingredients when dressing up that box of instant mashed potatoes... and she's considered a Chef?! On The Food Network?! I miss Mario Batali. I miss Ming Tsai. I miss Wolfgang Puck. Hell... I even miss Emeril Lagasse. Those guys started out in the trenches and worked their way up with the intent to teach America how to make good food. Now we've got Sandra Lee showing us how to make "Kwanzaa Cake." Where the Hell did she even come from? Which Producer is she related to?
Okay... Let me calm down here... Sorry. I didn't mean to go on such a tirade but it really bothers me that a television network dedicated to the culinary arts has become so convoluted with irrelevant content. It bothers me that many people who think that being a Chef would be "fun," have never really considered just how hard it can be.
All my ranting aside, I did enjoy the last decade working as a Chef and feel that I gained a lot. I honed a skill that some would say make me an artist, I learned how to manage in unmanageable situations, I think-banked enough stories to write a book and learned what works and what doesn't. I still enjoy cooking (though catering seems to be much kinder to me), and it's nice to not only be able to focus on my writing but go to school and have a day off as well. One of these days Chef Delaney will again be "running the wheel" but in the meantime, I salute those still in the trenches. They should be the ones making Rachel Ray's salary...
Seriously, nothing. Most people that see cooking on TV think how fun it would be to become a Chef, but they have no idea the amount of physical effort, insane scheduling, stress and lack of loyalty are involved. Also, there's really no money to speak of unless you're extremely lucky and in the right place at the right time. Do you realize that they average Chef works on salary for maybe $35,000 a year... and culinary school costs close to $48,000? Not just that, but most salaried Chefs work more than 60 hours per week and never have weekends or holidays off. That's Chefs folks - not cooks. Cooks can expect to make about $11.00 and hour and again, no weekends or holidays. Anyone who's ever worked a busy shift can tell you that it's not always fun. Orders start flying in faster than you can think, your coworkers can get irritable (and sometimes dangerous), oil-burns, cuts, steam-burns and bitchy customers are all a possibility and the list goes on...
On TV, you see sparkly-eyed spotless Chefs happily making one dish in an entire hour but in reality, a working Chef is on the verge of an adrenaline-fueled heart attack, is covered in kitchen spatter, reeks of garlic, is working on 10 dishes every minute and most likely holds a certain unspoken contempt for his customers. All this to try and pay off that student loan and still have enough left over for booze.
I'm not putting down every Chef you see on TV but lately The Food Network has been responsible for giving some complete hacks their own "cooking" shows. I stopped championing The Food Network after the introduction of Rachel Ray. Rachel Ray a Chef?! The guy frying your frozen calamari at Red Lobster has more credentials than her! Here's a woman who won a Food Network contest that dealt more with how the contestants looked on camera than their actual cooking ability. Now, she's teaching America that French's Fried Onions and canned corn are quality ingredients when dressing up that box of instant mashed potatoes... and she's considered a Chef?! On The Food Network?! I miss Mario Batali. I miss Ming Tsai. I miss Wolfgang Puck. Hell... I even miss Emeril Lagasse. Those guys started out in the trenches and worked their way up with the intent to teach America how to make good food. Now we've got Sandra Lee showing us how to make "Kwanzaa Cake." Where the Hell did she even come from? Which Producer is she related to?
Okay... Let me calm down here... Sorry. I didn't mean to go on such a tirade but it really bothers me that a television network dedicated to the culinary arts has become so convoluted with irrelevant content. It bothers me that many people who think that being a Chef would be "fun," have never really considered just how hard it can be.
All my ranting aside, I did enjoy the last decade working as a Chef and feel that I gained a lot. I honed a skill that some would say make me an artist, I learned how to manage in unmanageable situations, I think-banked enough stories to write a book and learned what works and what doesn't. I still enjoy cooking (though catering seems to be much kinder to me), and it's nice to not only be able to focus on my writing but go to school and have a day off as well. One of these days Chef Delaney will again be "running the wheel" but in the meantime, I salute those still in the trenches. They should be the ones making Rachel Ray's salary...
A fine rant Del. But you're WAY behind on your FN personalities. Bourdain already beat poor Rachel clean off the network onto her own daytime talk show. And Sarah Lee has already been held up as trying to single handedly poison your family with salt and MSG.
ReplyDeleteIf you're looking for laughable personalities, give the Neeley's a kick around. Their show is layered with sacharine layer of marital bliss that leaves me retching. Or Chopped, where successful restauranteurs drive potential customers away by being total asshats on TV. OR! (drumroll) BRIAN BOI-FRIGGIN-TANO! That rant pretty much writes itself.
Oh, and one last thing. As a refugee from the Red Slobster...specifically the frozen calamari jockey...you might pick a different kitchen for an allegory to poor kitchenry. The food might be crap, but we covered more tops than any brasserie in town and bled just as hard to do it. Pick on Darden Co. not their employees. I am not a fat, hoarse, culinary Backstreet Boy pimping Dunkin Doughnuts and Purina Dog Chow with equal aplomb.
I'm loath to defend an annoying hack like Rachael Ray in any way, but do you actually watch her show? You seem to be confusing her with Sandra Lee. Ray doesn't cook with instant mashed poatoes and doesn't often use canned vegetables. Ray's style is to take 15-20 fresh ingredients and slop them into one big sandwich/burger/pasta dish pretty much ruining the fresh (and often expensive) ingredients she started with.
ReplyDelete@ Pook - Perhaps I am a bit behind on my Food Network personalities but that stems from the fact that I gave up watching that garbage once they started bringing on show-hosts who had (have) no clue. I'm well aware of the whole Tony Bourdain-Rachel Ray conflict as I'm a huge fan of both his shows as well as his writings. I even met him at his book signing here and he had some very "colorful" ways to describe Little Miss Ray. As for the Red Lobster comment - I apologize. I wasn't necessarily trying to slam on Red Lobster or their cooks; I was merely using them as a popular example that would grab the attention of the readers (I love the cheddar bisquits btw...). I too have worked the trenches in a not-so-glamorous eatery (On The Border Mexican Cafe), and I know that there are some very talented and great cooks out there. In fact, that solidifies my point that the "frozen calamari jockey" is, in fact, a better cook than Rachel Ray. Hopefully my coment didn't offend you too much. Thanks for commenting Pook!
ReplyDelete@ Short (dis)Order Cook - I've seen both Rachel Ray's show as well as Sandra Lee's and I'm not confusing the two. I do recall an instance on Rachel Ray's show where she was focusing on preparing quick middle-of-the-week meals and she did in fact use instant mashed potatoes. I forget the brand, but it was an obvious product placement (plug) that left a bad taste in my mouth. People used to tune in to the Food Network to learn how to cook like the pros, and now they're being taught (by the "pros") that it's okay to subsitute chemically-altered foods, yet everyone wonders why Americans suffer from obesity and heart disease? It just seems that the Food Network used to be on par with the recipes included in "Gourmet" or "Bon Appetit" and now they're just one step above the recipes you'd find in the back of "Parade Magazine"...
Thanks for commenting!